This For Them gift guide exists because queer gifting has a specific failure mode: buying something that announces an identity louder than the person actually wants it announced. The trick is matching the volume of the gift to the volume of the recipient.
For Them sells queer goods made right — binders, underwear, gay hats, print magazine and accessories — and the range happens to span the full spectrum from a bandana nobody will read anything into to a tank that ends the conversation before it starts. Here is how to pick, sorted by who you are buying for.
For the friend who wants it subtle
Start with a bandana. Each one is 100% cotton with the For Them logo and made in the U.S., and the listing's own description covers the use cases neatly: tie it in your hair, tuck it under a hat, knot it around your neck, stuff it in your pocket, or wave it like you mean it.
Five colours are listed — lime, green, blue, baby blue and maroon — so you can pick to taste rather than defaulting to rainbow. Crucially, a bandana carries no sizing risk, which in a catalog where most items are final sale is the single most useful property a gift can have. Browse the colours at the For Them store.
For the group chat
Stickers are the correct answer for anyone you like but do not know intimately. The Very Gay Sticker Bundle pulls designs from three separate packs:
- Good Boy — described by the shop as oozing with tboy swag.
- Eating Out — created alongside the food issue, aimed at chefs and eaters alike.
- On Screen — references to favourite sapphic film and TV characters.
You can also buy the packs individually. On Screen is for the person who nerds out on queer film and TV; Eating Out suits anyone who loves food and loves eating; Good Boys is exactly what it sounds like. A sticker pack is also splittable across several people, which makes it the most efficient gift in the shop.
Stickers work as a gift for a reason that has nothing to do with price. They let the recipient choose the volume: a laptop lid is loud, the inside of a water bottle is not, and a notebook sits somewhere in between. You are handing over the design and letting them decide where it goes, which is exactly the right amount of decision to leave with someone else.
For the sports gay
The Sports Gay Foam Finger is the funniest object For Them makes. It is a mini foam finger — a foam finger for your finger, per the product page — built for the gay sports fan who wants everyone to know they are gay and also love sports.
Pair it with the "I Got Wet With For Them" Rally Towel, which is currently listed as pre-order and final sale, and you have a themed gift with a running joke built in. Both belong to the sports issue that the brand has been leading with, so they read as a set rather than two unrelated novelties.
For the reader
Autostraddle Print Issue #03 is the gift that keeps working after the novelty of merchandise wears off. It is a full-colour zine — The Autostraddle Insider — carrying queer essays, reported features, photography, horoscopes and puzzles, described as made by and for the community and as a piece of physical queer media that builds on a long legacy of LGBTQ+ zines. As the shop puts it: for over a decade you have read us online, now you can hold us in your hands.
The practical tip is on the product page. Add the AF+ ALL-ACCESS Quarterly Membership to the cart and you pay $0 for the magazine, which turns a one-off gift into a subscription for roughly the same outlay. Magazines are final sale and not eligible for return.
For the one who wears the same shirt every day
Some people do not want a joke on their chest; they want a good blank. The FOR THEM Long Sleeve Tee is 100% cotton at a heavy 7.1 oz/yd², garment-dyed, boxy and oversized with dropped shoulders and twin-stitched wide neck ribbing, preshrunk with a tear-away label. Sizes run S to 3XL.
If your person prefers something fitted, the Kiss Your Local TBoy Rib Baby Tee is a Bella+Canvas Micro Rib in 52% cotton and 48% polyester at 5.3 oz/yd², mid-length and sized XS to 2XL. And if they want the loudest possible option, the "Support Trans Wrongs", "Transsexual Dyke" and "Save a Cowboy Ride a Stud" tanks are all there.
For sizing, use the published width and length charts rather than the letter. If you are gifting apparel generally, our guide to premium blank tee brands covers how fabric weight changes how a shirt wears.
And for the podcast listener specifically, the Good Boy A-Frame Black Hat is the first official piece of Good Boys Podcast merchandise, designed by the hosts themselves — a structured, high-profile cap with an adjustable strap and a squared-off front panel. The shop's own line is the best pitch for it: maybe you love the pod, or you just enjoy a bit of praise. It is tagged as a members-only product, and hat products are final sale and not eligible for returns or exchanges for sanitary purposes.
Podcast merchandise is a narrow gift, and that narrowness is the point. If your person quotes the show, this lands harder than anything else in the catalog, because it is not generic queer merch — it is the specific thing, designed by the specific people. If they have never mentioned the podcast, buy the bandana instead and keep the hat in mind for later.
Before you check out at For Them
Three rules make For Them gifting go smoothly:
- Assume final sale. The magazines, bandanas, rally towel, hat and most tees and tanks are all marked final sale. Gift receipts are not going to save you here.
- Check the shipping note. The printed apparel — the long sleeve tee, the baby tee and the tanks — is listed as available to U.S. customers only.
- Size from measurements. Both the boxy and the fitted cuts publish full inch-by-inch charts. Use them.
If you would rather sidestep sizing entirely, stick to stickers, a bandana, the foam finger or the magazine. For gift ideas beyond this one shop, our roundup of personalized gifts for couples is a good next stop, and our Bruised LA review covers another label built on saying something specific.
Gift guide FAQ
What is the safest For Them gift if I do not know their size?
A bandana, the Very Gay Sticker Bundle, the Sports Gay Foam Finger or Autostraddle Print Issue #03. None of them depend on fit.
Can I return a For Them gift that does not fit?
Most likely not. Much of the catalog is marked final sale, and hats are specifically excluded from returns and exchanges for sanitary reasons.
Is the magazine a good standalone gift?
Yes, and there is a trick worth using: adding the AF+ ALL-ACCESS Quarterly Membership to the cart makes the magazine $0, which effectively upgrades the gift for the same money.
Pick something for everyone on the list at For Them.